I have been struggling with writing the past few days. Definitely not feeling it. This morning I was reading through some older stuff on my computer and came across this essay that was written by my now 17 year old daughter. She wrote this a little over 2 years ago. Be sure to read thru to the end as there is amazing insight there.
Where I’m From….
By L Wood
Lived in the same house my whole life,
I’m from memories that always flow through me,
Every time I’m home I remember happiness and strife,
I’m from dancing in the mirror and singing in the hairbrush
To playing with momma’s hair and daddy’s big bear hugs
And the girl who thought she was a boy until about 13,
I’m from the bridge over our favorite creek
That’s surrounded by pretty flowers in the spring
Who is my best friend and keeps all my secrets,
I can trust him
If you fast forward a little you’ll see,
I’m still from the same cute, little house,
But no longer a little girl walks out the front door,
But a young lady trying so hard to make her parents proud
I’m from frustration coming out of my Algebra 2 classroom,
I’m from a place that gets confusing,
But in this place God is able to use me
Where it’s impossible not to see to see someone you know when you go out,
I’m from a dance studio were I’ve thought through so many problems,
As I let my feelings through in the way my body moves
That’s deep in my mind,
A place that I don’t ever really show,
I’m from trying so hard to be myself,
To learning it’s always possible… If you’re brave enough*.
*This is such a sweet line for me to remember. She loved the Chronicles of Narnia and Aslan says this to Lucy in the movie, which had come out some time before she wrote this
Such insight from a 15 year old!
There is a place in all of us, a place that we never really show, the place that we keep hidden because we are sure that people could not possibly like us if they knew ‘that’ person.
I know that she is still working on this herself, but I hope she is able to find some success while she is young. It sucks to be 45 and not be comfortable in being who I am, of not even being 100% sure of who that is yet. I know that I am getting closer to discovering me, that I am becoming more and more brave and digging deeper and deeper within to those areas within that I have locked away for so long.
So, even now, at 45, I am trying so hard to be myself,
What about you? Are you comfortable with who you are? Do you know who that person is? Did you always know or did it take some time to figure it out?
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